Under new management

I’m trying Tena Night Super pads.1

I’ve been using Abena’s highest capacity anatomic pad for years. They recently changed from a plastic back to a cloth back. Since the change, I have been getting leaks.

Mostly, it’s a damp crotch on my stretch panty and pjs. It seems to be urine seeping through the (supposedly) waterproof backing. That’s bad enough – I have to launder them, right away. The smell would drive me crazy if I left them in the wash basket for even a couple of hours. And it’s an extra change of nightclothes and an extra load of laundry.

What’s worse is that I’ve also had real leaks – and a wet bed.

I have a waterproof cotton bed pad on top of the sheet (as well as a plastic cover on the mattress and another waterproof bed pad between the sheet and the mattress pad. So it’s not getting to the mattress. It’s easy to toss the bed pad, panty and pjs in the washer, get a quick shower and get back to bed. But I absolutely hate it all.

It’s easy to tell myself that bedwetting isn’t a big deal when it’s just tossing out a wet disposable in the morning. It’s less trouble than washing my hair in the shower.

But that’s a little hollow when I wake up in the middle of the night in wet, cold, smelly pajamas, on a wet, cold, smelly bed. When I have to do a load of laundry in the middle of the night. When I have to take another shower in the middle of the night. When I’m blundering around the house trying not to wake up J and the kids in the middle of the night. (PS: It’s been darn cold in this drafty old house this week!)

Most of the leaks have been little spots on the pad. That’s enough to get me out of bed. But a couple have been big. J and I could sleep in a single bed and have room left over. We snuggle tight and sleep in each others’ arms. I’ve been mortified that J is going to find out just how unpleasant a wet bed can be. It’s one thing to accept that your wife wears a diaper, it’s quite another to have her soak you in the middle of the night.

So I’m trying something different. J says I should give Abena a call. Maybe I will.


1 Not the confusingly named, available-everywhere, Tena Serenity Pad Overnight. I tried them, lured by the name into thinking that they were for a real bedwetter. They aren’t. They would be fine for a slightly leaky bladder or low-volume stress incontinence. I opened the bag and was skeptical (too small!), and I was right. The one I tried just flooded out.


10 thoughts on “Under new management

  1. Pingback: Management Review | Bedwetting Mom

  2. I found the very same problem as one manufacturer after another switched to the ‘cloth-like’ backing. They all seemed to be porous to some degree; Lille, Abena, ID. (I’m speaking of the taped briefs – safer for the male anatomy – rather than the pads, but the principle is the same.) How incredibly annoying and disappointing, that the primary function of the pad should be compromised for, what? Appearance? Tactile experience? Everyone just following their competitor? Talk about getting their priorities wrong. I hope that Molicare – who seem to make the only truly reliable overnight disposable still available – stick with their current offering and do very well out of it.
    take care,

    • The Tena pad has the cloth-like back. I haven’t had any problem with it leaking, and it is quieter. It doesn’t matter with the pad, but I would expect that a cloth-backed brief would breathe better. That would probably be more comfortable in the summer.

  3. How do you get your pads? Do you get them through prescription or out of pocket? My parents aren’t so understanding and only will get cloth diapers. I am a busy college student and cloth diapers are not doable because not only am I busy but it would smell up my room. So I end up paying out of pocket for disposables, maybe if I got a prescription it could be cheaper. Thank you for your blog, I feel less alienated for setting the bed in college and it gives me a place to vent my frustrations because come on, bedwetting is not something you discuss with people face to face.

  4. How do you change sheets without waking him? Is your bed two twins put together? Im looking for how to arrange sleep when I marry my fiance.

    • I don’t have to change sheets. As I mention in the post, I have a waterproof cotton bed pad on top of the sheet and another between the sheet and the mattress pad. If the Tena leaks, the top pad catches it before it gets to the sheet. I just toss the Tena in the garbage and put the stretch panty and the pad in the wash, put on a fresh Tena and lay a fresh pad on the bed. J doesn’t even turn over.

      The second pad (between the sheet and the mattress pad) is just in case the top pad moves or gets bunched up. I have had that happen a couple of times. In that case, I just put a pad on top of the wet spot on the sheet and change the sheets in the morning.

      • Hi Cat.

        I’ve recently found your blog. I’m a 25 year old bed wetter. Been dealing with this most of my life and no resolution medically is available for me. I have been in great denial about wearing any sort of “diaper” and feel like such a newbie to the world of what incontinence protection is available.

        I did a Google search and after reading you blog, I was honestly hopeful that I can overcome this without being ashamed to go to bed every night. I’m married and my partner is very supportive, but she’s also sick of helping me wash sheets every day.

        I have been experimenting with what protection works best for me and I am planning on buying the Tena pads per your suggestion next.

        I have a question about what you use for a waterproof cotton bed pad. I would love to find something that’s not super uncomfortable to sleep on. I currently only have plastic disposable ones that I put between the sheet and the bed protector, but I have to wake my partner up to change sheets in the middle of the night. I’m soooo sick of washing sheets every day, stinky room and tired and uncomfortable me!

        Thank you for being a beacon of hope for those who are ashamed to deal with this disorder.

  5. Pingback: Bedwetting in college | Diary of a Bedwetting Woman

  6. Fed Up:

    Thank you – That is very kind!

    I use Priva reusable bed pads, one on top of the sheet (to protect the sheet) and one under the sheet (as a last line of defense). If the Tena leaks, the bed pad on top of the sheet catches it. If it gets that far, all I need to do is wash the bed pad.

    If you google Priva bed pad, you can find it a lot of places on line. The drug store chains (Duane Reade, Walgreens and CVS) carry them in every store I’ve been in.

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